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Trash Talk: Last Call For The F1 Circus, Crunch Time in NCAA Football

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A little late to the post with Trash this weekend, had an issue crop up last night after a long week. But we are getting down to crunch time in both Formula One, last race of the season and it will decide the Drivers’ Crown, and it is now down to the last make it or break it couple of weeks in college football ahead of the conference championships. And, of course, there is a full slate of NFL games too.

So, I will be along in a bit with some actual content. Or maybe Marcy will slide some in too. I am sorry, long night and a bit of an aimless day so far and i need to get the post up and quit waiting for my fingers to spew out some malarky from me. So chat away, make your own prognostications and let loose. See, you get what you need!

Update: Okay, two bits of content, at least.

First, I think this is all a plot to make sure Boise State has a shot at #1 by the end of the year.

The No. 2 [Auburn] Tigers brushed off the storm brought by allegations of a pay-for-play scheme with another dominant offensive performance, beating Georgia, 49-31, in front of 87,451 to clinch the Southeastern Conference West championship and a berth in the conference title game.

There was a renewed allegation last week from an agent’s representative that Cecil Newton Sr., Cam Newton’s father, solicited money from Mississippi State when his son was being recruited. That is an N.C.A.A. violation that could result in Newton’s being declared ineligible, even if Cecil Newton did not solicit money from Auburn.

This is all headed to Auburn being disqualified just in time to leave Boise State with the best record.

And then there’s the NFL game of the weekend. Well, maybe not. While I’m looking forward to the Pats-Stillers game, I think the Brownies thumping of the Pats exposed the real New England, so I expect the home team Stillers to win handily.

Which brings us to the Ryan bowl.  In the Manning bowl, the expected winner–Peyton–won. And you gotta place $$ on Rex here. But I’m going to bet Rob Ryan’s Brownies surprise the J-E-T-S-Jets this weekend.

And in the loser bowl? The Bills will finally get their much deserved first win against the Stafford-less, Hanson-less Lions (though I hope not). Go Kitties.

Trash Talkin Texas Style

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This week’s Lowell Thomas travelogue takes our rolling wheels on down south to Texas. Because the Lone Star State is where, by far, the most important and compelling game is to be found. That would be Jerry Jones’ ‘Boys visiting the upstart Houston Texans. In honor of our trip down south, we have two, count em two musical selections this week. The first is from that little old band from Tejas, ZZ Top with their classic tale of a trip to an, ahem, girls club – La Grange. A little bit o trivia, La Grange is the actual “Best Little Whorehouse in Texas” made famous on stage and in film. The second selection is Gimme a T For Texas by Lynyrd Skynyrd in honor of the death of the actual namesake himself, Mr. Leonard Skinner.

But before we get down to the gridiron festivities, there is one big matter CHOMPing at the bits. Sharktopus! That’s right, tonight is the Emptywheel Sharktopus World Premier Sharktacular Extravaganza! The initial festivities kick off shortly before 9 pm Eastern time (8 pm Central) and will be hosted by Marcy, Eli from FDL and special guest Mystery Dub. Now, unfortunately, out here on the best coast, er left coast, we do not get the movie until 9 pm our time (that would be 9 pm Pacific, FDL and Arizona time), so I will be hosting a second set of festivities for all the west coast shark biters and bitees. This is the grand reemergence of the master of campy summer slasher movies, Roger Corman, and promises to be a load of really tacky and crazy fun. So, if you love seeing hot babes in bikinis frolicking and then being eaten by sharks – and who doesn’t?? – then join us tonight! (Much more after jump) Read more →

It’s Geezer Time! The NFL Season Takes Flight Tonight

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No more preseason watered down bunk. Boise State versus Virginia Tech was nice and all that. But those false fronts are behind us now because it is time for some real football. That’s right folks, Trash Talk is back for real!!!

Now all I got to worry about is a near 41 year old grandfather trying to keep himself and his walker upright out on a field with the most bulked up, fast and vicious young professionals the NFL has to offer. Marcy, on the other hand, had quite a fright this morning when Tom Brady was involved in a terrible car accident. Had to use the jaws of life to get the people out of the other car (a minivan), but Tom is as almost always, unscathed. Back on the field with the team later and, apparently, just fine. Jeebus, the dude must have stolen a four leaf clover from the Boston Garden or something.

But the real news of course is the rematch of the NFC Championship game from last season. Vikings at the Saints. As you may recall, it was a blood bath and one hell of a game. All your favorite characters are back. The Geezer, Adrian Peterson, Jared Allen, Drew Fookin Brees, Reggie Bush and Jeremy Shockey.

Mardi Gras is long over, but the party from Lombardi Gras is still rolling in the Big Easy. New Orleans is wired like it is the Super Bowl all over again. You gotta love it. The teams are both pretty healthy with two exceptions. Safety and defensive general Darren Sharper is still out rehabbing a knee and Sidney Rice is out for six to eight weeks with a bad hip. Both are key to their units, but these are two solid teams and they will make do just fine.

No reason not to believe it won’t be another outstanding game with these two teams on the field. If it is lopsided, it will almost certainly be in the Saints’ favor, as it is possible it takes a few games for the Geezer to get untracked. But it isn’t like he has never been to this rodeo before, so I expect a good game. Problem is, once again the game is in the Superdome in New Orleans, and that is tough. The edge has to be solidly with the Saints tonight.

So take out yer false teeth mama, it is time for the hard hitting to begin again; it’s the season opener in the NFL, Saints and Vikings! Trash it up!

Championship Sunday Trash

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There are two faces to Championship Sunday, the four best teams battling for the two slots in the SuperBowl, back to back games making for one great day of football. But it also means that football is nearly done for the year, and that is depressing. It was already a tough Saturday here with no football save for an uninteresting East West Shrine game. But today is huge, so lets get to it:

On tap first is the J E T S Jets Jets Jets visiting the lay down artists formerly known as the Colts. In my opinion, Indianapolis should have been disqualified from the playoffs for conduct detrimental to the integrity of the league. Instead, after defrauding paying fans for the last two games of the regular season, they will likely earn their way to the Super Bowl.

Peyton Manning is going to score points; as good as the Chargers were supposed to be, Manning simply cannot be shut down like the Jets did to San Diego. The question then becomes can the Jets score enough to keep up and pull out another win over the Colts now that the real Colts will be on the field? It is hard to see how, although with Bob Sanders out for the season, the Colts can be run on and the Jets do that well. The Jets are game, but the Colts win. Renaming Manhattan “Revis Island” may have been a bit premature.

The late game is the much awaited Vikings at the home of the N’awlins Saints. Grizzly Old Man River and Drew Fookin Brees. Reggie Bush and Adrian Peterson. Darren Sharper and Jared Allen. The edge has to go to the Saints because of the home dome noise factor and their more solid across the board defense. But if the Vikes play with the same intensity and composure they exhibited last week against the Cowboys, all bets are off. Percy Harvin is a game time decision due to debilitating migraines. Sharper and Shockey for the Saints have minor issues, but should both be good to go.

If The Vikes defense plays to their potential, like last week, and Favre and the offense can overcome the crowd noise and play in synch, the Vikes win the game; if either factor comes up short in any degree, they lose. That is a lot to ask against a Saints team that just seems a little more solid and consistent on both sides of the ball. This pains me greatly, but the Saints make their first Super Bowl.

Hope y’all enjoy the nice little video attached hereto; it was Marcy’s idea!

Divisional Playoffs Weekend Trash Talk

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Last weekend was supposed to be the big great weekend of exciting and wacky wildcard playoff games. With the exception of the Cardinals Packers Roaster in the Toaster game, they were all duds. This Saturday and Sunday we have another full slate of games, let’s hope they are better games that last weekend; I think they will be. Let em roll!

First up is the winner of that last, great, shootout last Sunday the Arizona Cardinals versus Drew Fookin Brees and da Who Dats. Both Kurt Warner and Captain Creole are gunslingers of the highest order. Honestly, Warner has had a better run in the last few games; but that shouldn’t mean much in this game, they will both come to play. The game is going to boil down to Arizona’s offensive line and defensive backfield; if both come up big, they can and will win. If not, the Saints win. The Cards will suck and the Saints will Laissez Les Bon Temps Roulez.

The late game Saturday is the Colts and Ravens. After all these years, it is still Ray Lewis versus Peyton Manning and both are among the very best who ever have or ever will play their position. The Ravens look pretty fierce lately and are the sexy pick among many to knock off the well rested Colts. Peyton Manning is going to score some points, you just know that. But without Bob Sanders on the Colts playoff roster, the Ravens should be able to get at least a little scoring done too. It is going to come down to Terrel Suggs getting at Peyton Manning. My heart wants the Ravens to win and take out the the lay down artists; my wallet will go with the dive artists formerly known as the Colts.

The early game Sunday is ‘Boys at Vikes. Tony Romo and the Old Man River Geezer. This game is totally dependent on the ability of the Vikings defense to match the intensity and performance of the Dallas D. If the Vikes come up big on D, they will win in the dome; if not, they won’t. The other factor is the Minnesota offensive line, which was great at the start of the year, but has really fallen off. As quick a release as Favre has, he needs time for the vertical passes they have been relying on lately. This one kills me, but I think the ‘Boys come out with the win.

Last game is the J E T S Jets Jets Jets at the Bolts. You have to take Phil Rivers over Mark Sanchez, and quite frankly the San Diego receivers are better too. LT has been resurgent and Sroules can cause havoc. The Jets defense is better than the Chargers defense by a wide margin though. Even if the Gang Green can keep it close, it just seems like Rivers and the boys can score enough to win. That is if the Jets can even keep it close. Plus RanDiego has been on a roll. Bolts win.

There is your lineup folks, time to work up a Number Six!