Real Deal Exit the Sandman and Mom Rock and Roll Trash Talk

/61 Comments/in , /by

Errr, some of you may have seen some illegitimate Trash Talk on a so called “Stub”. Illegitimate stuff. Please disregard the same. It was perpetrated by a “perp” that thinks Tom Brady Porn is teh awesomenest. Not sure that last word is really a word, but I’m gonna roll with it. Man, I tell ya, this job is hard work, hard work I tell ya. Also, to get the stain out of your brain, I am immediately referencing some classic real music. And for good reason: Sandmans and moms. This will be explained in due course, but please take a listen to the music.

More than that, let there be real football talk. Okay, Madam Wheel may have had some good shit actually:

And I’m going to admit ahead of time that BillBel is playing games with injury reports heading into Atlanta.

Also, Da Bears-Kitties game will come down to whether Stafford can find someone besides Megatron to throw to, with Nate Burleson out.

Also, I think Stillers will beat Matt Cassell (!)’s Vikings under Big Ben.

Okay, granted, I didn’t say it was a lot of good shit. Just a little. And as to the Stillers, man, I dunno, that is a fair fight. Given the respective O-Lines, Cassel may for a game be equal to Big Ben. And Cassel has one hell of a lot better running back. I might be tempted to give this turd of a game to the “home team”, but the thing is being played in London. Where, hopefully, they don’t give a shit about two once proud, but now joke, teams.

The Pats are at the Dirty Birds. Will Gronk play? Will Beavis and Butthead show up two weeks in a row to catch passes from Major Tom Brady wi9thout Gronk…or any other person you ever heard of other than Edelman? Yeah, inquiring minds want to know. But the Dirty Birds are tough in their dome home, think they may win this one. Who is more pathetic, the Skins or the Rayduhs? Yo, right, dead heat there. Jeebus, what tough times for proud brands.

Eagles in Mile High against Peyton’s massive arm, which is just starting to warm up? Fuhgettaboutit. I’d take the Fins if it was in South Beach, but in the Super Dome, take the Krew from Nawlins. Maybe the best game is Bears at Deeetroit. Lions I think they call them there in BK City. People yammer about how great and awesome Jay Cutler has been this year. but he has not been shit compared to Matt Stafford. Take a real look. I am rolling with Stafford, MegaTron and company at home against Da Bears.

Enough of this, let’s look at the students. Who are also athletes. But only marginally human for settlement purposes in craven class actions run by assholes. I have done a lot of things for a living as a lawyer, but never class actions. Not because I wouldn’t, just because I have not. That said, it seems often completely greasy. All deserve their day in court, and love the people that give it to them. But sometimes you have to wonder who the real winners are, and here it is certainly not the athletes.

So, on to the games, since the rest is depressing at best. Best game of the day is Georgia at LSU. I was surprised that the Dawgs whipped the Cocks on opening weekend. But the game is in Atherns, not the bayou. If you look at the paper, it seems no contest, Dawgs all the way. Don’t be fooled though, LSU is every bit the match, and if the game was in the Baton Rouge, I would be tempted to take LSU. But this game is in the Dawgpound. I will take the home boys, but it is that close.

The Sooners of our once and always friend, Freepatriot’s, love take on the Blighted Irish of Notre Dame. But the game is in Domerland, not on the Prairie. Frankly, I do not trust either of these teams. So, I will roll with the one at home. NOT! I will take the wagon circling Schooners in a road upset. If ‘Ole Miss were not in Tuscaloosa, I might be tempted to take them over the Tide. Nope. If the Badgers were in Cheeseland against the Sweatervests of THE Ohio State University instead of Columbus at the Horseshoe, I would be tempted to take them. But nope. There is not that much else out there that is exciting on the front end before they play the games.

No F1 this weekend, and the “America’s Cup” between two boats full of Aussies and Kiwis has ended (I have no idea where the fuck “America” was in the equation, other than it took place in a bay of San Francisco).

So, a word about the music and the Sandman. They are interrelated. The greatest reliever of all time, Mariano Rivera, is retiring. Indeed, had his farewell ceremony at Yankee’s Stadium Thursday night. By a sad coincidence, our good friend Spencer Ackerman’s mother, who was a consummate Yankee’s fan, passed away just before Mariano Rivera’s walk off the storied mound in the Bronx. I only wish that I had had the pleasure of meeting Spencer’s mom. Maybe even more, I wish my mom had had the opportunity. They were unique women in a time before that was necessarily quite so acceptable to see or admit. Heroes. And I will leave it at that. Mine is long gone, but Spencer’s loss is real; he is in my thoughts, and I hope yours.

With that, on somewhat melancholy note, we wrap up the Trash for this week. From very long ago- I think – I recall that Spencer’s mom had a thing for Jackson Browne’s music. So, we led off with that. We close with, as the Yankees did for Mariano Rivera, Enter (or Exit) the Sandman by Metallica. Number 42 for the Yankees is, and was, in a league of his own. It is fitting that he is the last player to wear the number 42 after it was retired for Jackie Robinson. No two men have ever worn a number better. Let 42 now rest and live in perpetuity as the mark of greatness.

Start of Fall Trash Talk

/66 Comments/in , /by

The summer is in its last throes and fall is officially here on Sunday. And with football season hitting its stride, it really does seem like fall. Let’s see what we have going on with teh student athletes this week.

A lot of Wheelhouse denizens will have interest in the big Sparty Domer tilt. Unlike last year, it looks like Michigan State has the dominating defense and Notre Dame has to rely on offense. Neither one of these teams is likely as good as people think they are, but someone has to win. Game in South Bend, so smart money probably is on ND. Can’t do it though, Sparty in an upset. There is a lot of interest in the Stanford ASU game for some reason, but man, after seeing them last Saturday up close and personal, the Devils are just not that good. The Tree is going to shed points all over ASU in Palo Alto. Tennessee might take the Gators in Knoxville, but not in the Swamp. Kansas State at Texas will be interesting because KSU has a bad habit of beating the Whorens – five times in a row. Dunno if Mack Brown can survive if he loses this game. Stay tuned!

Probably won’t be on in much of the country, but I have a morbid curiosity about the Jets and Bills battle of the rookie quarterbacks. The Jets may not be quite as dysfunctional as everyone thought, but EJ Manual looks like a better bet than Geno Smith. Edge to the Bills. I suppose the best matchup is probably Texans and Ravens, but hard to care about it. Packers and Bengals is maybe the most potentially exciting game on tap. Cinci is good, but…..Aaron Rodgers you know. Close game, but I’ll take the Cheese. Cardinals are a decent club actually, but son’t have enough for the Saints in Nawlins. Especially with Spidey Fitzgerald and Mendenhall hurting. Niners are apparently going to let their errant driving linebacker Smith play and should be able to contain Luck and his new back, Trent Richardson; although it may be a close game. Go Stillers!

F1 is in Singapore. I hate Singapore. Lot of people love Singapore and Marina Bay under the lights, but not me. Brad Spurgeon has a good rundown – and he likes the gig at Marina Bay, check it out. The big news of course is that Felipe Massa is out at Ferrari for 2014 and the prodigal Iceman cometh back. Kimi Raikkonen is to be paired with Fernando Alonso next year and that ought to be, um, interesting. Especially if the new equipment is as good as is rumored.

The Yankees look dead and there are still some exciting wildcard races in play. Chat em up. Thought it was time for a nice country song this week, and Honey Honey’s Angel of Death is simply superb. Give it a listen.

Rumble at the Big House Trash Talk

/119 Comments/in , /by

[As a reminder, it is fundraising week Chez Emptywheel. Please help support our work if you can.]

[special Live Update From the America’s Cup below]
We are only a week into real football and already there is a blockbuster game on tap. The Fighting Irish are going up the country to visit the Big Blue Bo Merlots at the Big House. Lotta B’s in that sentence, but it is hard to give these two teams A’s! (Thanks, I will be here all week, enjoy the veal). Well, at least this game is not in the ignominious class of the 2007 game, which was a scintillating battle of unvictorious and untied loser teams. So, there is that.

Now, what should we expect when expecting this mammoth matchup? For one thing, some great trash talking! And, man, there has already been some prime trashing going on behind the ESPN Gameday set in Ann Arbor. Check out the sign this guy has to greet the blighted Irish:

Play like your girlfriend is real today

Hahahahaha, oh man my side hurts. As an extra bonus, the Game Day folks were just discussing the Arizona v. UNLV game, and all picked “Rich Rod’s team”. The boos from the Michigan cognoscenti about shook the earth at the mention of Rich Rod. Some bonus trash from the Big Mitten: Michigan coach Brady Hoke slams Johnny Football by saying the reigning Heisman winner wouldn’t even be starting were he on the Big Blue. Whoa! Also, Notre Dame, in apparently the only way they could find to show that they can rock and roll, have added Bon Jovi’s kid as a walk on cornerback on their roster.

Since the NCAA put in their overtime rules, I guess someone has to win this game. My friend Armando (who weekly does a series of picks at Talk Left) has the Domers and the 4 points. Naw, Big Blue all the way baybee! Also on tap today is Jim White and Armando’s Florida Gators hooking up in South Beach with the Miami Hurricanes. This game is far from what it once might would have been, but still could be good. Canes in a big home upset. The other really sweet matchup is South Carolina at Georgia. Clemson clocked the Bulldogs in the first week. Hard to see the Dawgs going 0-2 to start the year, but I am rolling with the ‘Ole Ball Coach and his Cocks.

Well then, off to the NFL we go. The only game of note in the pros is The Cheese versus The Niners. Is san Fran as good as they looked last year? Does Colin Kaepernick have too many weapons now that he has Anquan Boldin to go with Vernon Davis and Frank Gore et. al? Who in the world is playing on Green Bay’s offensive line at this point and what will the Pack do for a QB when Aaron Rodgers gets his clock cleaned because of that porous O-Line? This REALLY pains me to say it, but Niners roll at home.

Couple of other pro games of note, namely the Sunday and Monday Night games. SNF is the Gents at the Owboys. Jerry Jones says he is so excited he has insomnia. Think Good Eli will show up to give Jerry indigestion too? Not me, nope this is early in the season and the Cowboys will dredge up some more usual hollow hope for the hometown. But they play again, and Eli will own that one. On MNF we have teh Iggles at the Skins. The much awaited debut of the Chip Kelly Quack Attack run by Mike Vick in the NFL, and the return of the rebuilt RGIII. This is a very tough call. Slight edge to Skins because they are at home, Kelly needs time to have his offense gel and Philly’s defense is a question mark. If vick stays healthy and productive though, watch out. A real sleeper game is the Cardinals at the Rams. Both teams are WAY improved. Watch out for Larry Fitzgerald now that he has Carson Palmer instead of a string of scrubs throwing to him, and the Card’s defense should be solid once again.

Lastly, this weekend is the Italian Grand Prix. There are a few MUST watch races on the Formula One calendar, and Monza is at the top. It always is, but there may be weather Sunday, which could seriously skew things and turn it into really compelling theatre. I was up for qualifying this morning and am sad to report the Red Bulls, led by Sebastian Vettel, have locked out the front row. Nico Hulkenberg surprisingly got his Sauber into P3, with Felipe Massa and Fernando Alonso in P4 and P5 respectively. The buzz everywhere is that this race, at effectively Ferrari’s home track, will likely decide Massa’s future. Out qualifying Fernando is a good start, but the result is what will matter. Massa is almost certainly driving for his future in F1 at all with Kimi Raikkonen’s potential return to Maranello lurking. The one thing in Massa’s favor is that Alonso wants no part of Kimi returning to the fold. Should be an interesting race and it goes off at 8:00 am EST on NBCSports.

THIS JUST IN: SPECIAL LIVE UPDATE FROM THE AMERICA’S CUP RACE!

ACRace 2This is from our very own fearless Emptywheel Roving Reporter Rosalind, hot off the wires!

“Greetings Wheelies! it is I Rosalind, Roving Reporter. The Emptywheel
assignment editor forced me to spend the weekend in San Francisco. Temp in the 80s, clear blue skies, giant boats flying across the water. Good times.

When we last met, I was waxing rhapsodic over the America’s Cup Sailing races finally coming to San Francisco, one of the most perfect natural venues for a sailboat race. Alas, Larry Ellison, Mr. Oracle, as defender of the Cup got to chose the new boat design and went with a radical new approach: giant catamarans with towering fixed wings that can go really really fast – 50 mph fast – but are wickedly unstable in the SF Bay conditions.

ACRace 3Two destroyed boats and one crew member’s death later, the official America’s Cup finals kicked off today, after a summer Challenger series where the only suspense was which boat was gonna break down first. Truthfully. I really wanted to blow off this trip, but you know how stern the EW taskmaster can be. So here I am, in glorious weather surrounded by tourists from around the World and SF citizens from all about and happy happy shopkeepers loving the influx of customers. The races are free to all, just head to the waterfront and pick a spot. Grandstands free for the public are near the Marina Green.

ACRace 4A relative treated me to a reception last night at the St Francis Yacht Club where the Italian engineers responsible for figuring out Computational Flow Dynamics made a lot of sense for why this new Wing technology will have other applications and is a great advancement, but they had an open bar and well, I’ll have to get back to you on that one….

The New Zealand boat looked scary good today, the boat was just flying over the water. The Oracle boat looked off its game from the get go. They lost a crew member over the side per-race, and it went down for, there. They had a rip in their Wing that they patched with Duck Tape (hee…h/t EW)

Races 3 and 4 tomorrow (Sunday).

That is it for this sporting weekend ladies and gents. There are a plethora of games and things to talk about, and let’s get to it in comments. Music this week by, of course, a Michigan man, Bob Seger and his Silver Bullet Band, with the classics Travellin Man and Beautiful Loser. Wonderful tunes if you have not heard them in a while.

The Return of the NFL: It’s ON!!!

/51 Comments/in , , , , , , /by

[Hey there Lugnuts!! We are having a fundraiser here at Emptywheel. Help the effort out! We have been really hesitant about doing this in the past. To the best of my recollection, we have not done one at all since leaving FDL. Marcy will not toot her own horn, but I will. The level, depth, independence, and rationality, of what Ms. Wheeler does makes most “Main Stream” and other “blogs” look feeble. And it is not just her, Jim White, Rayne and, occasionally, I who also contribute. This is a valuable forum. We live for you, but we also need your help. To the extent you can give it, it would be remarkably well placed, and much appreciated. Thank you!]

I have been being heckled about this Trash Talk stuff forever. Marcy is just cranky jonesing for football and Jim White thinks the Devil Rays count. But this ain’t called “Trash Talk” for nothing you know. Pre-season fake football and baseball in the swamps are not enough. Nosirree. Not in a sophisticated joint like this.

But there was a little smattering of real college football last Saturday, so there was primordial Trash. But, now, my friends, there is REAL, professional grade, NFL football in the queue. Let it be known, unless I meet a bigger margarita pitcher and burrito that looks like this tomorrow night, there will by Saturday morning be additional MAJOR LEAGUE Trash for the weekend. NCAA, NFL and the F1 Circus at Monza (yes, that really may be the bigger story worldwide. Formula One rules; get used to it).

But, tonight, there are two games on the schedule. The biggest, of course, is a replay of last season’s AFC Divisional Playoffs between the Denver Broncos and Baltimore Ravens. Ought to be a great game. Despite what the naysayers say, Peyton Manning’s arm is turning bionic in its incredible strength. The Bronco’s, however, are a bit wounded with Elvis Dumervil now on the Ravens and Von Miller suspended for the first six games. The Ravens have also lost a LOT of weight from last year’s Superbowl team, including Ray Lewis and Ed Reed. As much as the media and fans have always focused on Ray Lewis, I cannot help but believe the absence of Ed Reed, one of the most incredible ball hawks in the history of the NFL, is every bit as big a loss. Broncos are at home and are PISSED about that last minute loss last year to the Ravens. My money is on Peyton and the ARM OF HULK.

Secondarily, and I, (maybe you?) will probably have to DVR this, but the ASU Sun Devils are opening their season tonight at 10:00 pm EST against Sacramento State. Okay, this won’t be much of a game. But, GO DEVILS!!

That’s it for now. More later as promised. This is the best blog in the world, if I do say so from my completely neutral perch! Rock and roll my friends. Today’s music is by Government Mule. Because Donkos and Peyton rock….and, because, the US Government, collectively, are a bunch of War Pigs.

How Long Until ESPN Brand Is Damaged By Money Trumping Safety?

/9 Comments/in /by

ESPN stands perilously close to damaging its brand with repeated recent moves that appear to place their income stream ahead of safety. After working closely with Frontline for well over a year on a project documenting the effects of concussion injuries in football and especially in the NFL, ESPN on Friday removed their name from the effort, only a few weeks before the documentary was slated to air. Today, Kevin Brockway is out with an article in the Gainesville Sun noting the frequency with which the University of Florida has been forced to schedule early season home football games during early afternoon hours when heat indices are at dangerous levels for both athletes and spectators.

The New York Times noted yesterday that ESPN wields overwhelming power when it comes to setting the times for college football games to start, in some cases not announcing kickoff times until only six days before the game. Brockway’s article in the Sun shows the impact of ESPN’s decision-making here in Gainesville:

When the Southeastern Conference unveiled its week one 2013 football season start times, the collective groan from Gator Nation was heard from Key West to Pensacola.

For the fourth time in the last six years, Florida was stuck with an afternoon kickoff for its season opener. This Saturday’s 12:21 p.m. start time against Toledo at Ben Hill Griffin Stadium will force fans to again stock up on sunblock and bottled water.

But we aren’t talking about a mere inconvenience with the starting time. Figures on fans treated for heat-related illness in previous years speak to the danger of kickoffs at this hour in August and September:

The burning question is why? Why would the SEC schedule an early-afternoon game for its southernmost member during a month when the average heat index (which measures heat and humidity) is at its highest point of the year?

The answer lies in television, and some factors beyond the SEC’s control. Nonetheless, Florida administrators aren’t happy about the prospect of another sweltering Saturday opener. They consider it a fan safety issue. In 2011, when Florida began the season against Florida Atlantic (7 p.m. kickoff), only six fans were treated by medical staff for heat-related problems. Last season, when Florida opened against Bowling Green (3:30 p.m.), 105 fans were treated for heat-related issues.

A 12:21 kickoff is likely to be even worse than a 3:30 kickoff if rain showers don’t intervene, as the stands on the west side of the stadium usually are in the shade by 3:30 but not at 12:30, while shade doesn’t hit the seats on the east side until early evening.

As for the concussion documentary, here is how the Times described ESPN dropping out of particpation:

On Thursday, ESPN, which has spent heavily in recent years to build its investigative reporting team, abruptly ended its affiliation with “Frontline,” a public affairs television series that was weeks from showing a jointly produced two-part investigative project about the N.F.L.’s contentious handling of head injuries. The divorce came a week after the N.F.L. voiced its displeasure with the documentary at a lunch between league and ESPN executives, according to two people with direct knowledge of the situation.

As might be expected, there are now denials from the NFL that they exerted pressure and from ESPN that they bowed to pressure. Those denials do nothing to improve the optics of the situation, however, and it remains indisputable that ESPN withdrew its support just before the documentary slamming the NFL’s handling of concussions aired.

ESPN is in very dangerous territory right now. If Saturday proves to be especially hard on fans at early afternoon games in the South, the record is already clear on whom to blame for shifting games from their traditional evening kickoffs to the worst possible time for fan and player safety.

Premature NFL Trash Talk Under Duress

/67 Comments/in , /by

Are y’all paying attention to that Twitter widget thingy lodged on our blog on the right hand side? Well do ya? If so, then you have seen the oppressive brutality with which the otherwise demure Empthwheel has demanded pre-season Trash Talk.

I get no respect I tell ya.

So, here we are. Of course, all the cool talk is about the Patriots and Tim Tebow….WAIT….WHAT?….that’s not really the story?? Oh my, turns out there is MUHDERRRRR bout the ‘ole Foxborough and baby Jesus ain’t even close to the main story. Go figure?! And, this time, the OJ of the moment is juicing his fans with mash notes of innocence. Yippy-yi-o-cay-yay.

Alright. Okay. Let’s do some serious trash talking, mmmkay? And I ain’t messin around here. I think people in Gainesville know where this is pointed and I DEMAND response!

Q: What does a Saint, a Racist, and a Murderer have in common?

A: Urban Meyer and the Gators.

Boom!

I would say some phony smart bunk about the teams (seriously, Peyton Manning’s arm is growing stronger by the day and Donkos Rule!) but, hey, it is preseason and not a lick of it matters. As Marcy said, this is a test drive to see who of the normal Wheelhouse pit crew is still in the mix and what kind of chops the new recruits have. Represent people.

Oh, one last matter: The F1 Circus is off grid until the Belgian Grand Prix on August 23-25.

Oh well, it’s been a good day here in the hell of the desert. Turn it up and splay your opinions out here for all to see – on everything. Let’s rock.

Formula One Trash Talk: The Circus Comes To Oz Town

/48 Comments/in , , , , /by

Hi there Wheel, Empty, and and otherwise gear heads, it is time for Spring Trash Talk. There is a lot under foot, Spring Training in Major League Baseball, free agency season and pending entry draft in the NFL, the somewhat diminished fortunes of the NBA and, most of all, FORMULA ONE! The Circus season is upon us, and it is starting down under in the Land of Oz.

Appears we are starting off where we left off: there is yet no reason to believe the Red Bulls of Sebastian Vettel and Mark Webber are anything less than the cars to beat. But, that being said, there is also no reason to think that the Ferrari and McLarens are anything less than the threat that they were at the end of last season. Drivers make a difference in F1, and Fernando Alonso and Jenson Button are very, very good drivers. And their cars are not chopped liver either. For the clear superiority of the Red Bulls, and even the McLarens for that matter, Fernando Alonso pulled off one of the greatest performances in the history of F1 with inferior equipment last year. Alonso was only 3 measly points behind Vettel in the final Driver’s standings. Simply astonishing.

The opening two practice sessions for the Australian GP were late last night my time; i.e. between 9 pm and 12 am whatever the heck time AZ is. (Daylight savings time really screws with our heads here, cause we don’t do that). Bottom line…..not much has changed.

Okay, if I were pleading guilty (I would never!) to a heinous offense under truth serum to make sure I was cray cray (yeah, okay, this is some stupid shit too) I MIGHT admit that a lot of this post was written from a series of taco joints in Old Town Scottsdale. It is nowhere near as opulent as it sounds; hell even the mariachi music is piped in like Muzak. And the 60 something threesome at the table next to me looks like their Winnebago may be illegally parked out on Camelback Road.

Where were we? Okay, back to the Australian GP. Here is what Brad Spurgeon thought:

Red Bull and Sebastian Vettel have won all the titles for the last three seasons. Vettel became only the third driver in Formula One history to win three drivers’ titles in a row, after Juan Manuel Fangio in the 1950s and Michael Schumacher last decade. Only Schumacher, Fangio and Alain Prost have won more than three titles, with seven, five and four, respectively. So both Vettel and the team have more pressure on them than ever. Still, Red Bull has the advantage of the consistency of keeping the same two drivers and technical team, and Mark Webber is still pushing for his own final career chances to capture the drivers’ title. With the great designer Adrian Newey leading the way, Red Bull should remain among the strongest.

As a lifelong aficionado of Scuderia Ferrari, I would kill to demur. But, I cannot; I think that is right. Still. As to the beloved Prancing Horse, well, from the lens of the season start, it will take another superhuman drive for the ages by Fernando Alonso to keep Ferrari in the chips.

That leaves McLaren and Mercedes fighting for sloppy thirds. Maybe it will come to be that one will blast out of nowhere to be a contender for King Vettel’s Crown, but it is really hard to see. Lewis Hamilton proved himself to be a self absorbed punk at the more superior team, McLaren; now he will try to do what Michael Schumacher could not at fast, but unreliable, Mercedes. Please. Juan Pablo Montoya performed better and was sent packing to NASCAR.

For all the sturm and drang, for all the off season shuffle, the Championship will still be fought for between Red Bull and Ferrari, with a decided advantage to the former.

Let the Circus games begin!

And, then, there is the NFL free agency merrygoround. Heck, I do not know who are the winners and losers at this point. But, a quick take says the Steelers and Cardinals, the teams of local pricks bmaz and Scribe, did not do well.To be kind. Probably nobody did worse than the Cardinals, who signed an aging punt return specialist that even the Cleveland Browns did not care about anymore, and let go Kevin Kolb, the only even practice squad level NFL quarterback they had. Seriously, what kind of addled mentally challenged assholes are running the Cardinals? Oh, wait, it is still the fucking Bidwell family. Who could have guessed from this level of rank pathetic incompetence??

The Deetroit Kittehs seem to have done very well. If they can keep their peeps healthy and out of the klink, they may have the greatest show on fake turf. The Pats lost Welker’s whining wife (and shitloads of clutch catches in the slot and over the middle) BUT gained a sometimes fragile Danny Amendola. Amendola was the successor in kind at the Pirate attack fun/gun at Texas Tech. Amendola is actually every bit the route runner, and even faster, than Welker. But he ain’t as predictable, nor as reliable, as Welker. This could be a wash, or it could be a loss. Time will tell. The Pat’s defense and, especially, secondary looks to be much improved.

Other than the above, the Squawks got Percy Harvin and some other studs, and the Niners got some too. Whoo weee baybee, the gold rush is on on the left coast.

MLB is in Spring Training; let me tell ya something brother, it is fucking hot here. The NBA is in the stretch run, but the only question of interest I see is what lower seed will the Lakers fill? 8? 7? 6 looks bleak, but not impossible; though I would be shocked. We will return to that in a roundball post later. As we will with the student athletes for March Madness, and very soon.

Rock it, Talk it, Jayhawkit. Get yer sweve on Wheelies. Light it up.

Music by BB King, Bono and the band.

Super Bowl 47 Trash Talk: The Harbowling

/138 Comments/in , /by

It is finally Super Bowl weekend and it feels….kind of blah. Maybe it is because two brothers from an apparently nice wholesome family are squaring off after two weeks of nice making between themselves and their teams. I dunno, but there seems to be a distinct lack of intense vibe, at least to my senses. Super Bowl weekend is also always bittersweet because it is truly the end of the football season and of regular Trash Talk. Sure we will be around for the start of the Formula One Circus and maybe March Madness, but this is it for the regular Trash posts.

In New Orleans there is a party going on. There is also the nagging specter of Katrina hovering over the festivities. For all the glitz and glamor, the Big Easy is still a tale of two cities. There is the glitzy tourist centric French Quarter, which largely survived Katrina intact, the well to do areas of the affluent, all restored and ready to party, and the center of it all this weekend, the Superdome. They are all looking good.

Lets look at at the Superdome, which is not only rebuilt and beautified, but now bears the signage and imprimatur of the ultimate in prestige and wealth, Mercedes Benz:

The multi-phase $336 million project begun after Katrina wrecked the building in 2005, stripping away part of the roof and dumping water throughout, allowing mold to grow unchecked. Evacuees stewed in the summer heat without air conditioning or working bathrooms in a scene that epitomized the chaos of the disaster.

The Federal Emergency Management Agency provided $156 million of the renovation money, said Superdome manager Doug Thornton. He said renovating the Superdome was half the cost of building a new stadium.

“This is a brand new stadium,” said New Orleans Saints owner Tom Benson, who pushed hard for construction of a new facility before the 2005 storm. “It’s got all the things we wanted. I haven’t seen a finer stadium in the country.”

We bought that. Now that is not necessarily a bad thing, the Superdome was one of the symbols of New Orleans, and an eye that was blackened by Katrina’s surge and aftermath. It was important symbolically to heal and it is an economic driver for the city. Federal money spent means jobs and there is no denying the pride that the folks of New Orleans took in the rebuilding of their house and the rebirth of the Saints, culminating in their own Super Bowl season. It was a transfusion for an ailing city.

As we get ready to celebrate all that is good, glitzy and reborn about New Orleans, let us also take a moment for all that is lost and unrecovered. And there is still that. The population of New Orleans, although growing well, is still only about 80% of its pre-Katrina level and many of those were not the ones who were driven out never to return. Cleansing is a tough word, but it may have some application, and not in a good way.

Having taken a look at the side of the city that is whole again, let us also do so for the infamous areas that are not:

Most tourists this week will see the parts of the city that fared the best during the hurricane — the French Quarter and the Garden District, built on the highest ground near the Mississippi River. But many neighborhoods still bear Katrina’s scars, from the brown stains of high-water marks on buildings to piles of rubble on lots overgrown with weeds. Unemployment and crime rates are still high.

“It’s hard when you walk out the door and don’t see a house across the street,” said Nevles Brown, 46, who lost his home in the Lower Ninth, but now rents a refurbished one nearby.

His uncle, Ronnie Brown, lives down the block in a house that shouldn’t be standing. Still visible on the bright blue siding are spray-painted X’s — symbols drawn by rescuers who checked the houses for survivors in the early days. The front corner of the roof is sheered and splintered.

“I got nowhere else to go,” Brown said, sitting in a chair on the remains of his front porch.

Overall, you have to feel pretty good, both for, and about, New Orleans this weekend. They have come alive again, but there is still work to do and people to heal in the less glitzy areas. And then there is the homophobia that has surfaced in an ugly way over the last week in the hustle and bustle of the Super Bowl scene.

That is the tale of the city, now for the teams. Niners and Ravens. On the hermetically sealed, temperature controlled fake tundra. As the future of this blog may depend on it, I want to be clear:

The San Francisco 49ers will be the Champions of Super Bowl 47!

As my prediction record is basically 0 for the last few weeks, this should bode well for the Ravens and allow the good work here at Emptywheel to continue unabated.

There are several reason behind my Niners pick. First off, San Francisco has been to exactly five Super Bowls, and they have won all of them. Jo6pack and JohnT, both of the Bay area demand a six pack of Super Bowls. Ray Lewis turned his “last ride” into a sleigh ride. John Harbaugh has been too bubbly and fun, Jim Harbaugh has been too quiet and sullen, you KNOW he is plotting.

I could go over the usual litany of players and potential impacts on the game, but you know them already. Both teams are pretty healthy and ready to go. Lewis may still have a wounded Raven wing, but he played fine against the Pats and has now had an additional two weeks; he will be ready. I am going to go out on a limb here and say the difference may be…..Randy Moss. The Ravens play great ball hawking pass defense; Ed Reed and the boys will have to focus on Michael Crabtree and Vernon Davis. If they leave Moss one on one downfield, he will burn them. If they pay attention to Moss, there has to be less overage on Crabtree or Davis. Both are killers for Kaeprnick to exploit.

So, what will Roger Goodell be eating while in Nawlins watching the NINERS WIN? Well, not sure, but there is a laundry list of fine establishments that refuse to serve him. Man, that’s cold.

Music this week is by a variety of Big Easy big names. That is it, see you in comments!

Championship Sunday NFL Trash Talk

/96 Comments/in , /by

While Divisional Playoff Weekend is the best weekend of football, Championship Sunday is the best day. Saddle up buckaroos, it is here! Before we get to the games, a word about Notre Dame and Manti Te’o. They are both lying through their teeth, and it is a sick comment on all that is wrong with big time college football, and hallowed universities’ efforts to maintain their “reputation” at all costs. Penn State has got nothing on Notre Dame. Dave Zirin says much of what else I would have to say for now, so I’ll just let you read him.

First up is the Niners at the Falcons. Current line is Atlanta +4. The Falcons showed some playoff moxie not previously seen last week by withstanding the charge of Russell Wilson and the Squawks and winning with a last minute field goal. That is the good news in Ho ‘Lanta. The bad news? Well, Russell Wilson and the Squawk beat the snot out of them in the second half. And that onsides kick with 8 seconds left has to one of the worst coaching calls in the history of football. So, some real questions about the Dirty Birds still linger. The 49ers, however, looked locked and loaded in shredding the Packers.

If there was a weak spot in their performance last weekend, I don’t remember it. The only question is if Colin Kaepernick can summons up another performance like that. If he can come even close, it is probably bad bongos for Atlanta, because they have a history of being killed by mobile and athletic QBs – see Newton, Cam and the torching the aforementioned Russell Wilson. Still I think the QBs and offenses balance out and the game will come down to defense. I trust San Francisco’s defense more than Atlanta’s, and that is my pick.

In the nightcap, the Ravens visit Brady, Bill Bel and the boys at the Big Razor. The line is currently Patriots -8. That is a lot, and many pundits are even saying they favor the Ravens, apparently due to the force of will of Ray Lewis and some misguided thought that Tom Brady is just an average playoff QB now and that Flacco is maybe actually superior. These people are smoking crack.

There is a track record for this game as the same two played in the same place for the AFC championship last year. And the Pats have never lost at Foxborough with a SuperBowl on the line. They are not going to start now.

So, my call is Niners and Pats for the big game in Nawlins. That said, I would be just fine with seeing Atlanta and the Ravens there as well. After all these years, Tony Gonzales, who may well be retiring after this season, just won his first playoff game. And you already know about Ray Lewis being on his last ride. It would be fine to see these two warhorses play it out. We shall see, should be exciting!

We are getting to the end of the line for football this year, better whoop it up while you can. Let er rip! Music is a killer couple of songs by a new group called HoneyHoney out of Massachusetts. Their first album, “First Rodeo” is really great stuff for a debut effort. Highly recommended.

NFL Divisional Playoff Trash Talk – Platinum Style!

/106 Comments/in , /by

Yes, it used to be that all that glitters turns to gold. How archaic that is; it’s platinum now baybee! Our football weekend is now down to eight teams and four games. All pro, because the student athletes have all returned to the classroom (okay, yes, most of them are probably rolling in South Beach and setting up their off season PED schedules, but a boy can dream, no?). There has been some movement of the coaching and GM fronts, but none of it all that earth shattering, so lets get down to business.

The best games are the two Saturday matchups. First up is the Ravens at Denver. No reason to name check the players here, you know who will be on the field and how great they are. The key factor really may be the weather. “Mostly cloudy with isolated snow showers. Highs around 17.” Brrrrrrrrr! Trust me, it is COLD in Denver when conditions are like that, and there is no dome like Peyton had in Indy. Partially due to the cold, partially to not fully restored grip from his nerve injury, Manning has taken to wearing a glove in the cold for the Broncos. It may not be optimal, but I expect he will deal, and it will be no hayride for Flacco either. Both defenses are strong and relatively healthy, so the game may well come down to who gets untracked, Ray Rice or Knowshon Moreno. this could be a great game, but it is, after all, in Mile High. Oh, and Peyton has won nine straight against the Ravens. I think this is the end of the line for Ray Lewis. Donkos get er done.

The nightcap Saturday is maybe the topper of the weekend. Pack at Candlestick Park to visit the Niners. This is like old times, back in the day of Favre and Montana/Young, the road to the the NFC Championship always seemed to involve these two teams against each other. And it was always a killer matchup. Still is. This year, the Niners rolled The Cheese in GB early in the year. But that was before the Pack got untracked; they seem to have some of the momentum back now, and have even found a decent, though not spectacular, running game. Dujuan Harris is no Frank Gore, but he has given the GB offense some help with tough yards. Both defenses have all their key folks back and ready to go. Both teams have had problems with their place kicking, but Mason Crosby has been good the last two games. But in the Aaron Rodgers versus Colin Kaepernick battle, you have to take Discount Doublecheck (and he STILL has a chip on his shoulder over the Niners not drafting him as a hometown hero). Cheese Baby!

The Sunday slate opens with Seattle at Atlanta. This should be a great game, pairing maybe the hottest NFC team, the Squawks, versus the number one seed, Atlanta. Try as I might though, it still doesn’t seem to have the luster of the Saturday games. Seattle looks like a steamroller right now and Atlanta seems kind of underwhelming for a number one seed. Make no mistake however, the Dirty Birds and Matt Ryan are traditionally extremely hard to beat in their home dome, and they are very solid. The Falcons are desperate to avoid a fifth straight playoff loss, the Squawks are on a serious roll; something has to give. My head says take Atlanta at home; my gut says Seattle gets the upset.

Last, and emotionally kind of least, is Houston at New England. Lately it has been Houston playing like patsies, not the Bill Bels. As good as the Texans have been over the entirety of the season, it is just darn near impossible to generate any sense of belief in them right now. Last week Houston looked like crap in barely holding off the Bengals, who played pathetically. Four weeks ago, the Texans were blown out at Foxborough, and the Pats didn’t even have The Gronk that game. Gronk is back, and Tom Brady is not going to let up off the gas. Adam Shefter thinks the Texans might be an upset special. Not me, I think the Texans have a problem. Ring the Bill Bel!

There is the ultra shiny Platinum Coin Playoff lineup folks. In some regards, this is the best weekend of the NFL year, what with two must watch games on both days. Great stuff. Music by Simon and Garfunkel with a Hazy Shade of Winter, cause it will be just that in Denver at Mile High.